Showing posts with label SAHM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SAHM. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

My Rockstar Experience

Morning Snappers! Today is Day 4 of my guest blogging series! I am dragging this morning! Please forgive me for forgetting to attach Miss Morgan's intro! I did it from my phone, in the bed, while squinting with one eye open! Then I dragged myself outta bed and to the computer to give her the proper intro she deserves!!!
 I came across Miss Morgan at The Inklings of Life, while I still lived in Kentucky! My half-brother's wife, who I started to attempt to get to know on FB(because they lived cross country on a military base), kept posting things on her FB wall from this little chickadee!  I fell in instant blogger love! I became her biggest stalker! No , seriously!  I was in awe of her awesome writing ability, and a few months ago her awesome-ness level shot through the roof for me!  She started a photo challenge! Which I have participated in every single month since January! (for those of you who don't follow along regularly, I have always done photography on the side, it is my passion!) And we have become bloggy friends! I adore her, she is a doll! Equal parts mom, tattoo artist, military wife, Miss Creativity, who just opened her own ETSY store, gorgeous pinup SAHM, and sarcasta-momma galore! I hope you love her as much as I do ! So get to reading! Now! Then go and show her some lovin'!

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My Rockstar Experience

When you make the decision to become a stay-at-home-mom, one of the first things you think about is money. Will your significant other make enough to support the whole family? Will you feel like a functioning part of society if you aren't actually bringing home any money? Money, money, money.

Not how amazing your child will be now that you are staying home with them. Not how you have to worry about the child and the house and don't have to go to a job that you probably hate, in an outfit that you probably hate, having to answer to a boss that you probably hate. Not that you are fortunate enough to be able to stay at home with your little one. These things don't cross your mind.

Until you deposit $92 into your bank account. Yep, that's all it takes. Hell, sometimes it's only $12 and I feel like a rockstar. Yes, I will explain.

I am a stay-at-home-mom whose kids are 11 and 8. No, I don't homeschool, so during the day while my kids are at school, those hours are my own. I spend that time writing, cleaning, doing laundry, getting dinner squared away, getting any shopping we need done, and crafting. I extreme coupon and consider that my contribution to the monthly income (when you get free toilet paper, ketchup and cake mix, then yes, I consider that a positive), but as far as an actual paycheck or consistent money we can count on, it really doesn't help to look in my direction. 

I decided to take some of the time I spend crafting and make things to sell online. Last week I opened my store with a whopping 18 items- that's it, just 18 items. I crossed my fingers, sacrificed a chicken in the name of the online sales gods and remained hopeful. 

I've made $92 so far, and let me tell you, when I transferred that $92 into our checking account, I felt like a millionaire. I started doing the "I'm Rich" dance, the kids stared at me like I was crazy, I marched right upstairs to where my Hubby was and said, "Guess who has two thumbs and just deposited $92 into our checking account? This girl," and cheesily pointed at myself. I stood and waited for him to praise me, to act like this $92 was the difference between life and death, that without it we would have been eating cracker crumbs and drinking water that we had just bathed the children in. 

"Good job, baby" he said with a laugh. That's it. 

That's fine, though. I know how important my $92 is. I may not have contributed to our income in almost a year now, but my $92 is special. Rockstar special. I'll get calls any minute now from Angelina Jolie wanting to have lunch and Ryan Gosling wondering if I'll leave Hubby to go run away with him. The IRS will definitely be keeping an eye out for my tax returns this year, making sure I'm claiming all of my newly made dough.

Or so, that's how it goes in my head. Apparently on the outside I just look strange sitting at a table all by myself having an in depth talk with Angelina about how Brad and her little ones are doing. (Sigh.)

 
 
 
Hope you enjoyed!
 
 

Monday, April 8, 2013

The ADD Housewife of Rural Iowa

Hiya Whipper Snappers! Today we have my blogging buddy Miss Sarah at The Sadder But Wiser Girl , featured as my guest blogger of the day! She keeps me in stitches on a regular basis, and her post today will have you cracking up! Luvya Miss Sarah!

Awhile back I was DESPERATE!  Desperate for some time away from blogging while I wrapped up a long term substitute teaching job.  Ginger came rushing to my aid and wrote me a great post that made a lot of people a little nostalgic for their high school prom.  Now I'm repaying the favor by writing a guest post for her.  I hope you enjoy it!


The ADD Housewife of Rural Iowa

He even has a Superman t-shirt.  He might as well wear it every day to work…
 
My husband, aka Evil Genius, works 4000 hours a week saving  the day pretty much every day.  He is an engineer for an agricultural company in Iowa, and apparently that's what they do.   Since he’s been on a couple of major projects at work, he gets up in the wee hours of the morning, drives an hour to and from work, and sleeps occasionally.  It makes sense that he’s a wee bit tired/grumpy/off his rocker these days. 
Meanwhile I’ve been a SAHM for a while other than a brief subbing job that I just finished.  Just because I stay at home does not mean 1) I have tons of time on my hands and 2) My house is neat and tidy.  This is because I am a horrible manager of my time.  I’m not a big fan of housework either, but I know when I just have to do it.  Time gets away from me and the next thing I know it’s after five and it’s time to get supper going.  Things get left undone and I feel horrible about this.
Yet I think that Evil Genius wonders what I really do all day while he’s gone, especially when he comes home to me not having done the things I SHOULD do.  I certainly don’t play video games like he does to pass the time.  He knows this.  But I wonder what HE thinks I do all day while he’s gone.  So naturally I wrote about, because that’s what I do.
(Keep in mind that no actual husbands were consulted for this post.  It’s all based upon a very scientific system that I use to surmise just what he’s thinking, called guessing.)

Wheeee!  Look at me!  This is what I do ALL DAY LONG…
 
*My day as I think Evil Genius probably sees it
I get The Professor up for school, then go back to sleep for the rest of the time he’s getting ready.
The Princess practices world domination while I doze on the couch.
The Professor heads off to school, I fall back to sleep.
I eat a well balanced breakfast of bon bons.
I play on the computer for 9 hours, telling everyone near and far about personal stuff I shouldn’t share.
I eat a snack-more bon bons.
I miss seventeen phone calls because I forgot to turn the ringer on my phone.
I laugh maniacally at the dishes piling up in the sink.
Lunch is whole grain pasta with cheese (no one eats bon bons for EVERY meal).
Whoah, I’m eating again-even more bon bons.
I play My Little Ponies and Hello Kitty legos with The Princess until the **cows come home.
I go diving in the mountain of laundry now residing in the living room.
I allow The Princess to run around like a wolverine all day, hair unbrushed, wearing only her underwear.
When The Professor arrives home, I give both kids large quantities of food so they won’t eat supper.
I plot the easiest and least exciting dinner ever, five minutes before Evil Genius arrives home.


Iron Maiden?  There are some strange things going on in my house…
 
How my day really goes
In the early, early, early morning I Iisten to Evil Genius's alarm go off 57 times.  I have dreams about smashing the alarm clock.
The Princess gets up at 6 am.  I tell her to go back to bed.  She comes in every five minutes wanting to know if it’s time to get up. I finally give in.
At 7 am I wake The Professor up for school.
I play a rousing game of “Please hurry up and eat” with The Professor.  He eats even slower.
I shove The Professor out the door and tell him to run so he won’t miss the bus.
I work on my blog, check social media, and look for a job.
I try to keep my eyes open as the same episode of Abby’s Flying Fairy School that has aired 5613 times   comes on.  AGAIN.
I put laundry in the washer, see the dishes in the sink and make a mental note to wash them later.
Macaroni and cheese is requested for lunch AGAIN.  Ok.
I conclude that Caillou really would be better off dead.
I work on my blog for a few minutes and check all my social media.
Once again I kick myself for not going to bed on time the night before, fall onto the couch and doze off. 
I make a foolish attempt to drag The Princess out for a walk. I remind her that when she’s five there will be no more stroller.  She's not buying it at all.
The Professor arrives home-healthy snacks are distributed.  This is when I realize that I never put the clothes in the dryer.
I work on all online stuff a little more.
I make a mad attempt at folding clothes.  They may or may not be put away.
I realize how close it is to suppertime and I finally start on the dishes.  I also try to figure out what we want/have ingredients on hand for supper. 
Evil Genius arrives home and I greet him with a smile and ask him how his day was.  There is incoherent grumbling and then he almost falls asleep in the chair with his laptop.  And here I thought love was dead…
So that’s what REALLY happens… Do you ever feel like you never get anything accomplished during the day?  Do you think your husband thinks you lay around all day eating bon bons?  Do you even know what a bon bon is?
*Remember my highly scientific system… guessing.
** Cows don’t actually come to your house in Iowa.  That only happens in Missouri.

Sarah The Sadder But Wiser Girl lays around the house in her pajamas and eats bon bons all day. She also writes a blog, which severely cuts into her bon bon eating time.  Visit her blog at http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com and maybe stage an intervention on the whole bon bon eating thing.  She’ll thank you later.

Oh, she’s also a pretty pretty princess…


Thanks a bunch Miss Sarah! Be sure to give her some love, and follow her at


The Sadder But Wiser Girl
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