Friday, October 14, 2016

My Missing Piece

The door is open, the lid is off

My soul is laid bare to the rush of memories

The last birthday, the last embrace

The sweetest and final kisses you laid upon my face

Our last hours spent, the passage of time

Far too quickly it all went

The last days played out as destined by fate

The onslaught of a reckoning would not abate

The reaper by my side, awaiting the inevitable

Me recounting your precious memories for you

All the while turning the table

Mother becomes the child, the child the mother

Big shoes to fill, however uncomfortable

The void is coming, the time is drawing near

A life without my mother is my biggest fear

Everything in it's own good time they say

It was hell watching you slowly slip away

Time slowed down, yet the day was over so fast

And before I knew it, before my eyes and holding my hand, you passed

You carried me inside of you, and were there when I was born

You walked beside me, raised me right

Taught me to always love the lord 

To do unto others and live your life as an example

Most of all, in example and in teaching

You taught me that in love, to always practice what your preaching.

You were there when I came into this world

And so I knew it just wouldn't be right 

If I wasn't there holding your hand when God extinguished your light

Immediately I assumed my new mantle with grace

Filling mother's shoes would take a lot of time and grace

I don't know if I ever can be as great as the woman who created me, if I can ever take her place

All I can do is try, to fill the role you spent my entire life training me for

How to live a full and happy life when you are there no more

Allegory suits me this day

However this emptiness, this endless aching void 

Is something I cannot write away

However I try to spin it, its been a hard week, 

Seems as if my eyes are set to a constant leak

Marked days are the worst, and today happens to be one

Your last birthday on earth, five years ago, you turned sixty one

Today you would have been sixty six, and flowers I will take to your grave and fix

No amount of tears shed nor prayers in vain, will ever bring you my way again

Putting the puzzle pieces together again, it all seems wrong

The one piece I need to glue it all together is gone

It all seems wrong and will forever

This broken life I walk without you mother

Love you forever, miss you always!